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Home / Birthday / Happy Birthday – Balloons
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  • Step 1: Fetch Your Card

  • Hot diggity dog! It’s time to celebrate a birthday! Sniff out the best card to make someone’s birthday pawsitively perfect.

  • Fill-in-the-blanks to reveal your hilarious message
  • Or
  • Contains adult material that may not be suitable for kids.

  • Step 2: Unleash the Funny!

  • Step 3: Here’s your pawsome custom card! Click your answer to make changes, then click anywhere on the screen to save.

  • Happy Birthday, {NAME OF RECIPIENT:8}!

    So, you’re another freakin’ year older! An old {CURSE WORD REFERRING TO A PERSON:9} like you certainly deserves {A SEX TOY ENDING IN (S):11} and {BODY PART ENDING IN (S):14} for your birthday! Seeing as they didn’t have any more of those at the gift store, I decided to send you this Funny Bonz Card™ to let you know that I think the world of you and your {BODY PART:15}! You’re welcome, you adorable {OFFENSIVE NAME:20} - or as they called you back in the day, “You little {ANIMAL AND BODY PART:22}!”

    But for real, you are one of my favorite {CRUDE BODY PART NAME ENDING IN (S):17} and I want you to know how special you are to me; even though you smell like {SOMETHING RANCID:24}. So, I’m sending you mad love for your special day and best of luck with your {INFECTION/DISEASE:25}. I truly hope they invent an ointment or some form of suppository for that unfortunate situation!

    All my {TERM OF ENDEARMENT AND BODILY FUNCTION ENDING IN (S):28},

    With love,
    {YOUR NAME/WHAT YOU'D LIKE TO BE CALLED:27}

    P.S.

    {JUST IN CASE YOUR CARD IS A LITTLE “RUFF”, FEEL FREE TO THROW THEM A BONE WITH A PERSONAL MESSAGE!:69}
  • {Your Message:95}
  • Avatar
    Happy Birthday, {NAME OF RECIPIENT:8}!

    So, you’re another freakin’ year older! An old {CURSE WORD REFERRING TO A PERSON:9} like you certainly deserves {A SEX TOY ENDING IN (S):11} and {BODY PART ENDING IN (S):14} for your birthday! Seeing as they didn’t have any more of those at the gift store, I decided to send you this Funny Bonz Card™ to let you know that I think the world of you and your {BODY PART:15}! You’re welcome, you adorable {OFFENSIVE NAME:20} - or as they called you back in the day, “You little {ANIMAL AND BODY PART:22}!”

    But for real, you are one of my favorite {CRUDE BODY PART NAME ENDING IN (S):17} and I want you to know how special you are to me; even though you smell like {SOMETHING RANCID:24}. So, I’m sending you mad love for your special day and best of luck with your {INFECTION/DISEASE:25}. I truly hope they invent an ointment or some form of suppository for that unfortunate situation!

    All my {TERM OF ENDEARMENT AND BODILY FUNCTION ENDING IN (S):28},

    With love,
    {YOUR NAME/WHAT YOU'D LIKE TO BE CALLED:27}

    P.S.

    {JUST IN CASE YOUR CARD IS A LITTLE “RUFF”, FEEL FREE TO THROW THEM A BONE WITH A PERSONAL MESSAGE!:69}
  • Avatar
    {Your Message:95}
  • Happy Birthday, {WHO IS THE CARD FOR?:7}!

    So, you’re another year older! I can’t believe you are {A HIGH NUMBER:12} years old today!

    I wanted to send you a {BIG ANIMAL:10} for your birthday, but it was too big to wrap! I was going to bake you my favorite cake made of {SOMETHING YUCKY:13} and {SOMETHING DELICIOUS:18} but I didn’t know if you would like that because I know your favorite cake is {ANIMAL / SOMETHING YUCKY:16}. I was going to buy you a {SILLY THING:19} but I know that you would really rather have a {REALLY SILLY THING:21}… I searched everywhere and just couldn’t find that in any store!

    So, I decided to send you this Funny Bonz Card™ instead to make you laugh on your special day! I really do hope you have the most {COOL WORD:26} birthday!

    Your {YOUR RELATIONSHIP TO THE BIRTHDAY BOY/GIRL:23},
    {YOUR NAME/WHAT YOU'D LIKE TO BE CALLED:29}

    P.S.

    {JUST IN CASE YOUR CARD IS A LITTLE “RUFF”, FEEL FREE TO THROW THEM A BONE WITH A PERSONAL MESSAGE!:69}
  • Avatar
    Happy Birthday, {WHO IS THE CARD FOR?:7}!

    So, you’re another year older! I can’t believe you are {A HIGH NUMBER:12} years old today!

    I wanted to send you a {BIG ANIMAL:10} for your birthday, but it was too big to wrap! I was going to bake you my favorite cake made of {SOMETHING YUCKY:13} and {SOMETHING DELICIOUS:18} but I didn’t know if you would like that because I know your favorite cake is {ANIMAL / SOMETHING YUCKY:16}. I was going to buy you a {SILLY THING:19} but I know that you would really rather have a {REALLY SILLY THING:21}… I searched everywhere and just couldn’t find that in any store!

    So, I decided to send you this Funny Bonz Card™ instead to make you laugh on your special day! I really do hope you have the most {COOL WORD:26} birthday!

    Your {YOUR RELATIONSHIP TO THE BIRTHDAY BOY/GIRL:23},
    {YOUR NAME/WHAT YOU'D LIKE TO BE CALLED:29}

    P.S.

    {JUST IN CASE YOUR CARD IS A LITTLE “RUFF”, FEEL FREE TO THROW THEM A BONE WITH A PERSONAL MESSAGE!:69}
  • {Envelope Number:63}
    Happy Birthday, {NAME OF RECIPIENT:8}!

    So, you’re another freakin’ year older! An old {CURSE WORD REFERRING TO A PERSON:9} like you certainly deserves {A SEX TOY ENDING IN (S):11} and {BODY PART ENDING IN (S):14} for your birthday! Seeing as they didn’t have any more of those at the gift store, I decided to send you this Funny Bonz Card™ to let you know that I think the world of you and your {BODY PART:15}! You’re welcome, you adorable {OFFENSIVE NAME:20} - or as they called you back in the day, “You little {ANIMAL AND BODY PART:22}!”

    But for real, you are one of my favorite {CRUDE BODY PART NAME ENDING IN (S):17} and I want you to know how special you are to me; even though you smell like {SOMETHING RANCID:24}. So, I’m sending you mad love for your special day and best of luck with your {INFECTION/DISEASE:25}. I truly hope they invent an ointment or some form of suppository for that unfortunate situation!

    All my {TERM OF ENDEARMENT AND BODILY FUNCTION ENDING IN (S):28},

    With love,
    {YOUR NAME/WHAT YOU'D LIKE TO BE CALLED:27}

    {P.S:74}

    {JUST IN CASE YOUR CARD IS A LITTLE “RUFF”, FEEL FREE TO THROW THEM A BONE WITH A PERSONAL MESSAGE!:69}
  • {Envelope Number:63}
    {Your Message:95}
  • {Envelope Number:63}
    Happy Birthday, {WHO IS THE CARD FOR?:7}!

    So, you’re another year older! I can’t believe you are {A HIGH NUMBER:12} years old today!

    I wanted to send you a {BIG ANIMAL:10} for your birthday, but it was too big to wrap! I was going to bake you my favorite cake made of {SOMETHING YUCKY:13} and {SOMETHING DELICIOUS:18} but I didn’t know if you would like that because I know your favorite cake is {ANIMAL / SOMETHING YUCKY:16}. I was going to buy you a {SILLY THING:19} but I know that you would really rather have a {REALLY SILLY THING:21}… I searched everywhere and just couldn’t find that in any store!

    So, I decided to send you this Funny Bonz Card™ instead to make you laugh on your special day! I really do hope you have the most {COOL WORD:26} birthday!

    Your {YOUR RELATIONSHIP TO THE BIRTHDAY BOY/GIRL:23},
    {YOUR NAME/WHAT YOU'D LIKE TO BE CALLED:29}

    {P.S:74}

    {JUST IN CASE YOUR CARD IS A LITTLE “RUFF”, FEEL FREE TO THROW THEM A BONE WITH A PERSONAL MESSAGE!:69}
  •  

     

    Happy Birthday, {NAME OF RECIPIENT:8}!

    So, you’re another freakin’ year older! An old {CURSE WORD REFERRING TO A PERSON:9} like you certainly deserves {A SEX TOY ENDING IN (S):11} and {BODY PART ENDING IN (S):14} for your birthday! Seeing as they didn’t have any more of those at the gift store, I decided to send you this Funny Bonz Card™ to let you know that I think the world of you and your {BODY PART:15}! You’re welcome, you adorable {OFFENSIVE NAME:20} - or as they called you back in the day, “You little {ANIMAL AND BODY PART:22}!”

    But for real, you are one of my favorite {CRUDE BODY PART NAME ENDING IN (S):17} and I want you to know how special you are to me; even though you smell like {SOMETHING RANCID:24}. So, I’m sending you mad love for your special day and best of luck with your {INFECTION/DISEASE:25}. I truly hope they invent an ointment or some form of suppository for that unfortunate situation!

    All my {TERM OF ENDEARMENT AND BODILY FUNCTION ENDING IN (S):28},

    With love,
    {YOUR NAME/WHAT YOU'D LIKE TO BE CALLED:27}

    {P.S:74}

    {JUST IN CASE YOUR CARD IS A LITTLE “RUFF”, FEEL FREE TO THROW THEM A BONE WITH A PERSONAL MESSAGE!:69}
  •  

     

    {Your Message:95}
  •  

     

    Happy Birthday, {WHO IS THE CARD FOR?:7}!

    So, you’re another year older! I can’t believe you are {A HIGH NUMBER:12} years old today!

    I wanted to send you a {BIG ANIMAL:10} for your birthday, but it was too big to wrap! I was going to bake you my favorite cake made of {SOMETHING YUCKY:13} and {SOMETHING DELICIOUS:18} but I didn’t know if you would like that because I know your favorite cake is {ANIMAL / SOMETHING YUCKY:16}. I was going to buy you a {SILLY THING:19} but I know that you would really rather have a {REALLY SILLY THING:21}… I searched everywhere and just couldn’t find that in any store!

    So, I decided to send you this Funny Bonz Card™ instead to make you laugh on your special day! I really do hope you have the most {COOL WORD:26} birthday!

    Your {YOUR RELATIONSHIP TO THE BIRTHDAY BOY/GIRL:23},
    {YOUR NAME/WHAT YOU'D LIKE TO BE CALLED:29}

    {P.S:74}

    {JUST IN CASE YOUR CARD IS A LITTLE “RUFF”, FEEL FREE TO THROW THEM A BONE WITH A PERSONAL MESSAGE!:69}
  • Hidden
  • {Sent To You By: (first):84.3} {Sent To You By: (last):84.6}
    {Sender\'s Address::77} {Sender\'s Address Line 2::78}
    {Sender\'s City::79} {Sender\'s State::80} {Sender\'s Zip/Postal Code::81} {Sender\'s Country::82}








    {Send To: Name (First):41.3} {Send To: Name (Last):41.6}
    {Address (Street Address):34.1} {Address (Address Line 2):34.2}
    {Address (City):34.3} {Address (State / Province):34.4} {Address (Country):34.6}









    {Envelope Number:63}
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